The Shallows

 

Starring Blake Lively and directed by Jaume Collet-Serra, The Shallows is a film about medical student Nancy Adams who travels to a secret secluded beach in Mexico in honour [and to pay a tribute] to her mother who died of cancer who went there in her youth.Whilst there she goes for surf and discovers that she is not alone in the shallow seas near to the beach.What will be the outcome..?

This film,without a shadow of a doubt, is one of the most ludicrous,unintentionally funniest films I’ve seen in a very long time!

it’s a battle of halfwits in this watery version of “127 Hours”between Adams and the shark lurking in the waters as she shows all the ineptitude that you would never want from anyone practicing medicine.The woman is all fingers and thumbs as she manages to get herself into more and more difficulties with every passing minute and the [shallow] plot gets more ridiculous by the second.Any suspense that may have been in this film is gone within the first 5 minutes of the start as we are introduced to the predator in the waters that wants our heroine for breakfast,lunch and supper..

To say the acting is wooden would be an understatement,Lively is anything but what her name suggests and she is acted off the screen by “Steven” the seagull stranded on the rock with her with a gammy wing who is far more deserving of a mention than our female lead.In the end you kind of start wanting to cheer the shark!

However, this film is so bad that it becomes one of the cinematic highlights of my year.I could not help myself for genuinely laughing out loud at bits of the film that was meant to be suspenseful.The bit with the flare gun has to be seen to be believed,there is now also a case for wearing ear-rings as a medical supply and the end battle between our heroine and the shark is so preposterous that I  [and the rest of the audience] was still laughing as I left the screening..

Trust me,you have to see this film just for the sheer audacity of it all..

Wonderfully bonkers for all the wrong reasons..

Joxer Film Rating

8/10

[it really did deserve a lower score]

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